Make the Best of (5/5): Things to chew on

In the following section I want to give you some things to chew on. They will probably apply to everyone but I broke it down into what each year is likely to be dealing with.

1st years

You are the babies, and that is perfectly fine. There is no hurry to look mature and have everything figured out. Be curious, if any year should be able to do that it is you. Ask stupid questions. They are always the best ones, as long as you have the patience and the humility to know that you are not going to figure it out right away.

I want you to wrestle with this question starting today, in light of Mary and Martha, what does choosing God over school look like?

2nd years

Maybe in 1st year someone prodded and kicked you in the butt and kept you going, and you went to some church because all your friends went, maybe you're here at CCF because you have been doing all your life.

You are 2nd years now, so just as Joshua told the congregation of Israel when they finally got to Canaan, choose for yourself. Will I go out of what's familiar and safe? Will I think of and see God for myself? Or would I rather busy myself with my five year plan and the usual Christian routine and mob mentality if that is all there is?

3rd years (and 4ths who are not graduating)

This 2nd to 3rd year turn is the toughest of these 4 years. Your expectations suddenly change from being receivers to givers. So while the 2nd years should get started on deeper, it is absolutely crucial for you, because for whatever reason, a lot of you will forget or think you do not need to receive anymore.

Yet here is a simple fact, you can not give what you do not have.

I am sure you received much in 1st and 2nd year, but if your journey deeper ends there, then what you have to give stops there too. Do not let your zeal for the Lord overtake your intimacy with Him.

If any year needs to remember to be Mary, to stop plugging away at the same old same old and to value His presence in new ways, it is you 3rd years. I know God is eager to do that for he said, "Come all who are weary", but only if you stop and come.

Graduates

Me and Giselle met up with an old friend in New Zealand and she told me I should always say this next bit preceded with a "dun dun dun" sound.

One of the motivations that drives my work here at CCF, is I know that the transition off the campus fellowship will be a huge wet blanket for most of you. Maybe you will be able to go back to your home church where things are great, hearing from quite a few of you, maybe not. Maybe you will find another great community in whatever city you end up at, I am trying to do that right now, it is really hard.

After 12 years at Mac, I have realized, not just for CCF, but campus ministries in general today do not prepare you for a life in anything other than full time ministry; that going harder, doing more, does not strengthen you for the thorns ahead.

When your life here at Mac, when this great community ends, what you will leave with is not the meetings you led, or the causes you have served on, or the theology you have memorized. What remains, what will ultimately be tested after this time of frenetic spiritual activity is over, is your inner connection, your personal relationship, your own intimacy with God.

Deeper is the only thing you take with you.

I am tired of watching zealous brothers and sisters get choked out after they graduate before they have even realized they can't attend or learn their way out of dryness anymore. So if busyness, even for God, is starting to become just busy, if you have not been intentional these 4 years about going deeper with God and valuing His presence personally, please, make decisions today that will change that.

Make the Best of (4/5): Share

Story "Clarence and the Mormons"

Over the last 12 years at CCF, someone every year, without fail, will complain or worry that CCF is not under anything bigger or we do not have any theological oversight, or have highly trained staff.

As much as I understand their concerns I am actually glad for that because it means you get to explore and wrestle without being overprotected and have some sandbox drawn around you constantly. As for me, even though I used to get so much cut eye for this, I like that I do not have a seminary degree because I never get to play that card, and you never get a chance to rely on it.

That, however,  does not mean that there is no one looking out for you; that you are all prone to drinking whatever kool-aid comes along. Look around you, you have 70 brothers and sisters at your side. Beyond that, look inside you, you are the residence of the Holy Spirit, the spirit that Jesus said will guide us into all the truth.

While it might be easy for one of us to fall off the rocker, but if we're willing to be authentic and vulnerable to one another in our DGs, willing to slow down and listen and discern God's heart at PMs, willing to actually wrestle and not just google our way to easy answers when we look at the bible together, if we are willing to be a community that perseveres through each other's explorations and messes and questions and doubts with the Holy Spirit, rather than always proxying through the most popular authorities, it will be hard to fool all of us.

Jesus said in Matt 18 "where 2 or 3 gather, there I am also", and in John 16 that His spirit will "guide us into all the truth". Those are promises He'll keep as we put our heads, our hearts and our experiences together and move deeper into the heart of God. Which is exactly what the Bereans did when they heard Paul, they opened their bibles together and wrestled with it together, and they were commended for it by the Apostle.

Not only that, just as exploring and wrestling takes us beyond where our histories could take us, sharing in each others journeys will take us beyond where we could go by ourselves. It pools together all of our explorations and revelations so that we as a fellowship can partake in all the things that God has spoken over this community. We become greater than the sum of our parts.

The race is long. Your walk with God, Him willing, will continue long after you have graduated.  By exploring, wrestling and sharing this journey with those around us during these undergrad years, we starting building habits that point us beyond where our spiritual histories would allow us, and begin to prepare ourselves for a future with God that few of us would have thought possible.

Make the Best of (3/5): Wrestle

Story "Does being challenged spiritually just mean being told to do, in a louder, more convincing and more persuasive way, things that we've heard and agreed with hundreds of times already?"

There is nothing wrong with that per se. There is nothing wrong with evaluating our lives and being reminded of things that we should be doing.

But Jesus did say Mary chose something that was better than what Martha chose.

Of course, that story in Luke 10 is not telling us to simply stop looking at our behavior or get out of serving, but what I think is latent in the story of Mary and Martha is that growing and abiding in Christ is more about who we are in God's eyes and how we value His presence, than it is about what we do as servants and what we do to fix ourselves.

That Mary Martha contrast is what we actually need to be challenged in in undergrad as this is probably the largest step a lot of your have ever taken out of your childhood Christian environments. We need to be challenged in the way we perceive who God is, how we view who we are, what we think He expects of us, and how we and God relate and interact.

Yet those sorts of foundational, soul-shaking paradigm shifts are precisely what we tend to skim over or avoid or even be hostile towards, because we think we have that figured out by now and we're scared to be seen doubting or wrestling with such things. Just as with that CCFer I talked to that first frosh week potluck, we Chinese Christians tend to gravitate towards environments and paradigms that push us to go harder, but not necessary deeper

Because Chinese! Working hard defines our race, and our spirituality.

If your spiritual environments, whether it be church, or fellowship, or a mentoring relationship, is urging you to work and serve and learn and strive but not moving you into deeper personal revelation and experience of intimacy with God, you are not being challenged to grow there.

Story "It’s either God or I’m having a psychotic episode"

I am not telling this story because i think the spiritual gifts are really important or that being pentecostal is the thing to do, but to say that it is unlikely you are ever going to grow and go deeper with God if you are already busy sticking with what you agree with and feel safe about.

In Acts 17, Luke describes a group called the Bereans. They were Jews living in a foreign Roman city. As with all the places Paul visited, he testified about Jesus, and it must have been earth shattering for the Bereans. Clearly it was earth-shattering enough for the Jerusalem Jews to crucified Jesus.

Yet the Bereans did not attack Paul, nor did they let it go in one ear and out the other, they did not reference their rabbi or teacher and let them dictate whether Jesus was legit. If they had done that they really would've missed out, just as I would have if I went to the prophetic conference with a closed mind, closed heart and just laughed everything off as coincidence or sheer luck, and chose not to follow up on that encounter.

When you explore, have an open mind, truly wrestle with what you see and experience. Often times God building you up will require Him shaking you to the core and laying down a deeper foundation. Let Him take you deeper than the safe and the familiar, do not be afraid to stop and wrestle.

So explore, go and see. Wrestle, be taken deeper. Lastly, speaking of the Bereans, Share, do it in community.

Make the Best of (2/5): Explore

Story "Academic consultancy…..or Starcraft"

Some of you, before you even got to Mac, have had everything already settled and hammered out for your life, whether it be your schooling, your career, your sort of church, your faith practices, how you view your relationship with God, etc. You have grown up with a ton more teaching and voices keeping you safe and on the straight and narrow so to speak, than I ever did.

Yet I wonder if you think that what you've been told is all there is? I wonder if you're content to sit in your childhood sandbox, always learning and knowing that there's more to God, but never venturing out to find Him?

I wonder if you are satisfied with that. I wonder if you have had enough of God in your life already.

Jesus in Acts 1 told his disciples, indirectly telling us, that we are to be his witnesses to the ends of the earth.

Story "I married a lawyer ... material and expert witnesses"

Expert witnesses are chosen because of their academic study and achievements. Their “expert-ness” is relied upon to give a third-person, arms length interpretation of the evidence leftover by an incident.

Material witnesses, on the other hand, were people who were actually there at the incident. They saw. They heard. They felt. They often were changed by that experience.

So which type of witness was Jesus calling us to be?

In Acts 4, Peter and the disciples were brought before the Jewish authorities, the Sanhedrin, because their were spreading the word about Jesus. The scripture records that Sanhedrin specifically noticed that they were uneducated, common men and that they have been with Jesus. They stood out because they were not experts and that they had spent material time with Jesus.

So when I think back to Jesus telling us to be his witnesses, I believe he meant material witnesses, not theological experts. We are to testify of what He's done in our lives and the lives around us, not just postulate and theorize about things we have not seen.

Because the kingdom of God is real, the person of Jesus is real today, the Holy Spirit works today. They are not just words on a page; they are not just data.

There is more to you, there is certainly more to God, than what you have learnt, than what you have been told and how you have been shaped. Now is the time, when you are surrounded by possibilities and bus passes, to get out of your familiar spaces and familiar ways and seek Him out anew: to see the things that you think you know, and walk with God in completely new ways.

Try out different church services, fellowships even, start new spiritual disciplines, questions the easy answers, doubt things you never dared to before, prayerfully examine the expectations and limitations that have been ingrained in you.

Explore and witness and testify to more of God, He really is immeasurably more than you can imagine.

Make the Best of (1/5): Intro

A question that God was chatting with me on my honeymoon was that, by His grace, my race has lasted well past undergrad. I’m 31 this year. So looking back, what would have prepared me better spiritually in my transition to being a kingdom-pursuing working adult?

If I could do undergrad all over again what would I have done differently? What would I have paid more or less attention to or done more or less of?

When I came back to CCF 2 years ago someone asked me once what was the biggest difference between the CCF of my era and now. There are, of course, a lot of differences throughout the years. When I first got here we were 25 people meeting in the TSH 7th floor women’s studies lounge. We also had a few years where we were trying different pho's. Let's just put that discussion to bed. I have been to every pho that has opened or was open in Hamilton in the last 12 years, BnT is the best.

Fun aside, the most glaring difference to me is that you guys are under so much more pressure to perform and to succeed than we ever felt. So many of you are in a rush to have everything figured out. There is this whole life plan, this whole way of life, that you or maybe even someone else has laid out for you.

Which brings me to the first thing I want to encourage you to do,

DGLT 2K12 Session 3 (2/2)

A Culture of Honour

One of the first things I shared at DGLT this year is that leadership is not about titles, and that you do not at all need a title or even a ministry to contribute greatly to this fellowship. So to wrap up our semester together, I want to restate this again: whether we have an official position or not, we are all responsible for the atmosphere, progress, and health of this community.

We are all in this together

I am not saying that we all need to find some ministry task to do at CCF, but I am saying that with our love we can all contribute to an atmosphere of faith and joy, and help take care of any concerns out of a place of peace and hope rather than anxiety, impatience, and frustration.

Acts 6:1-6 Now in these days when the disciples were increasing in number, a complaint by the Hellenists arose against the Hebrews because their widows were being neglected in the daily distribution. And the twelve summoned the full number of the disciples and said, “It is not right that we should give up preaching the word of God to serve tables. Therefore, brothers, pick out from among you seven men of good repute, full of the Spirit and of wisdom, whom we will appoint to this duty. But we will devote ourselves to prayer and to the ministry of the word.”

And what they said pleased the whole gathering, and they chose Stephen, a man full of faith and of the Holy Spirit, and Philip, and Prochorus, and Nicanor, and Timon, and Parmenas, and Nicolaus, a proselyte of Antioch. These they set before the apostles, and they prayed and laid their hands on them.

So the Hellenist (greek) widows were being overlooked, and who were the ones who ended up taking charge in remedying the situation? Greeks! This was not anything glamourous, they were compared to waiters after all, but they were willing to give of themselves to a need that they saw, a need that others could not or should not cover.

Now of course not everything will wrap up quite as neatly as that. New needs will arise that will require us to figure out the appropriate adjustments from time to time as God moves CCF forward, and point leaders must decide on such changes with discernment and prayer. Ultimately, however, any positive change that we wish to see will require the support and dedication of many (dare I say all) of us to realize, far more than what the titled folks can alone bring.

No one is allowed to come and tell the leaders that "I need this this and this to grow, feed me" (well, I would say first years, newcomers, and non-believers get a bye). We are all expected to contribute our love to the concerns that we see, regardless of whether the point leaders have the resources to make those concerns a priority. You all have grown far too much to be telling yourselves that your powerful love can change nothing!

Honouring each other

On that note, one of the primary ways we can foster the health of this community is to practice a culture of honour, where we recognize and appreciate, privately and publicly, the contribution and significance of everyone around us. In my experience, the people who receive that least, but would benefit us all if they had more of it, are your titled leaders.

Many of you will find out sooner or later that it is not so easy standing in that spotlight, becoming the lightening rod and scapegoat when people get frustrated over whatever it is that bothers them. So as I noted in part 1, be proactive in encouraging leaders, or any helping hand for that matter. Celebrate each other's strengths, give recognition to each other's care and love, however small. Though our asian parents likely never taught us or showed us, learn to give praise publicly, frequently, for the fingerprints of God on each other. Learn to do it beyond the warm fuzzies at retreat.

Steer people away from griping about the fellowship (about leaders or anyone else), protect each other from that. This does not mean you have to pretend that everything is always going great, but be always, firstly, appreciative of everyone's servanthood. Bring your concerns to leaders as a partner with a fresh point of view, not as an armchair quarterback with accusations of negligence. Be faithful and hopeful of what God can do with you all. I can say with certainty that God is, and always will be, with Mac CCF. Seeing the good will allow you to address the bad from a position of faith.

This verse is pretty over the top and I am pretty much preaching to the choir, but still worth remembering:

Galatians 5:14-15 For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” But if you bite and devour one another, watch out that you are not consumed by one another.

I charge each of you, whether titled now or future or not, to maintain that sort of hopeful and honouring culture here at CCF. It is just so much better that way than otherwise.

DGLT 2K12 Session 3 (1/2)

Winds of Change

A lot of you have been talking to me about all the growth you have had with your brothers and sisters here at CCF, and asking about how do I bring some of that back home, or to the schools you are going to next. Some of you have tried to help out before, only to be met with a lot of frustration, even resistance, and you are wondering if you did something wrong or that positive change is just impossible.

I just want to say that I have seen very few places that were beyond changing for the better. God is big, and His goodness transforms people and places.

I of course have to follow those sentiments by saying that there is no magic bullet. Change, especially if we are talking about some of the Chinese churches we grew up in, is often going to be painfully slow, requiring the utmost patience, and sometimes a realization comes that we are not the ones chosen to usher in what we wanted to see, all of which comes on top of the possibility that life will take us elsewhere long before we see the fruit of any labour.

Though there may be no definitive answers for changing the whole culture of a place, I wish to at least share with you how you can be a positive force on the people around you while honouring those (especially in leadership) who might for whatever reason not see the goodness you've received at CCF, all while avoiding pulling your hair out. Change might not be for certain, but I am entirely sure that we can be a force for the better wherever we go.

Home is where God says it is

Often, especially for graduates, I hear one of 2 sentiments: that their old church sucks and they have to find a one that is better, or that they must go back and help their home church.

I will talk about being encouraging later, but I do want to say right now that neither of those directives are necessarily true. Over the years I have seen no correlation between the health of your home church and whether God will have you go back or not.

So just because your home church "sucks" does not mean you should be leaving, and just because your home church is awesome does not mean you are staying, or vice versa.

Having said that, the prevalent trouble is when people insist that they must go and make their home church better. Even if God impresses on us to do so, we must patiently wait on God as to when do I go back. We talked about seasons in session 2. Quite often before going any place there is a season of preparation elsewhere, as Moses had leaving Egypt, and your years at CCF are not guaranteed to be the only years that God needed to prepare you.

Be careful that you do not begin to put on your own shoulders the spiritual well-being of your home fellowship. Let us be reminded that you can not grow them, you can not transform them, you can not be God to them. You are only there to spill over what is flowing into you; to welcome Him, to usher in His presence through what you are (present tense) continually receiving.

Hence the following points if you want to be a positive force back home:

Change starts with your joy, your hope, your peace

Are you wanting change because you want others to encounter God at least as much as you have and continue to have? Or are you wanting change because you want to be more comfortable there?

You do not want to come out of a place where you are trying to change them so they can feed you and cater to you better. An attitude that expects a return simply will not work.

Remember, you are not going home empty-handed. All of you whom I have had a chance to talk to, you have grown so much, received so much. What God has planted in you are not things that will only exist at CCF. I believe that God has planted seeds, gifts, talents in all of you that will continue to flow even when you are away. Now that a lot of you have tasted a greater portion of His presence through your time at Mac, I want to tell you that He is always available!

Do not let a heavy or frustrating spiritual environment make you feel like you have nothing. Do not let it take you out of that place of joy and peace with the Lord. Maybe home really is full of gossip, negativity, and views you as an ignorant child, but God's presence will shield us, and melt that around us, should we take the time to soak in Him. (Hopefully in one of next year's DGLT's I'll spend some time talking about some personal practices that help keep us in that place of joy, hope, and peace with the Lord when we're away from community)

On a practical note, if things are really really tough back home, do discover some alternate communities to connect to and receive encouragement from. I meet up with an old friend of mine to run a workshop at Campus Challenge every year in May. We are at difference places now, but it is always refreshing and encouraging to gather and bless others who are hungry. Perhaps some of you in the future will patron your local CCF. I know Ontario CCF's are likely the fellowships with the least help, and I myself find a ton of joy from watching you guys grow.

Take the time to cherish your relationships with your Mac friends during the summer and after graduating. Maybe with all the musical and prayer warrior talents I have seen, you guys can work together and do things like run P&P's at each other's churches. Or do training stuff together like I am doing with prophecy and Samuel's Mantle. Or simply just meet up to pray and encourage one another. Do not assume that just because you are back home that you should only connect with them and you ought not step out or that your Mac friends can not join or help you.

Give of the abundant love that you are continually receiving, not so that they could fill your dry well in return.

Change needs to come to people, not events

Yes, the service might be archaic, yes, the church/fellowship leaders may be stifling, and yes it is ridiculous that they think Jesus Culture is too emo and leads to depression (you may laugh, but true story), but do not let that suck you into pouring your energy over events and how they are ran.

For you will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it;
    you will not be pleased with a burnt offering.
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
    a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.

Psalm 55:16-17

All through out scripture we see that God ultimately cares about the heart; in the end what God wishes to transform are the hearts and desires of His people (I already mentioned James 1:15 at retreat, and the second half of Romans 12:2 points to the same thing)

By your love, usher in a new way of being, a new way of seeing, and their doing (with perhaps just a light prodding past old fears) will naturally be open to adjustment. If you instead start by demanding them to change what they are doing, before they really see and desire God's goodness as demonstrated in your walk, I guarantee you confusion and conflict that is edifying to no one.

Story: "Kelvin back home"

That is not to say you can not try events like P&P should the opportunity present itself, but the aim is always to help people receive more of God's love personally. So even if we may have the opportunity to change everything, I would suggest taking it easy and focus on building deeper relationships that lead to openness, vulnerability, and trust. As much as we want to turn the light on full blast from the get-go, we all know people's eyes hurt a lot less if you turn it up slowly.

Practically, I would caution against taking on a leadership responsibility until you feel that people (including leadership) trust you and are open to you. I can assure you that leadership opportunities would arise rather quickly. In my experience, graduates who come back to their home churches with sustained joy and peace (and attendance) are few and far between, and existing leadership is usually quick to try to make use of their passion.

Jumping into a position right away usually puts you in a hard place where you might be expected to dedicate your time and energy into things that will divert you from loving people on a personal level, or worse, be asked to execute things that you cannot be wholehearted about anymore. I think it best to avoid that turmoil and simply dedicate yourself to loving people every meeting, bringing a new depth of sharing to those relationships, and genuinely valuing other's lives. I have never seen that cause a problem and it leads naturally to healthier influence via trust rather than position.

Also, be an encouragement to the existing leadership. If you are thinking about change then there is probably already a half dozen people who are at non-nonchalant or disgruntled. Do not become one of them. While it might be true that there are things you do not like about what they are doing, I am sure that God's goodness is working through them in some way. Practice seeing that. Honour that. Encourage that. Let them know that they are not being judged by their performance, and that you love them as brothers and sisters.

A biblical community, a culture of love, is only truly represented by the hearts behind its relationships. A greater love is what you bring home, far more than a greater way.

Change, transformation, speaks for itself

Of course we all want to see more people transformed and hate to see that get knocked on, but do not spend your energy on persuading people who are skeptical, critical, or negative.

I used to think that we needed to fight the establishment; that we needed to confront the old wineskins who refuse to let the new wine be new. Of course that tends to breed a lot of what I now know to be unnecessary conflict and sets up many roadblocks to healthy community that would take years to mend.

But I have realized now that the most persuasive thing you can demonstrate is when you walk lovingly with people and you grow together. Nothing speaks more of God than a group of people who love God and love each other extraordinarily. No amount of negativity or criticism can silence the sound of people flying with God.

Even the pharisees knew that. Have a read through Acts 5:33-39.

Feed the flame, not the trolls. People's desires and passions will not change because you have managed to argue them into submission. They will change when they see you and others fly.