Gift of Rebuke

I want to look at a pretty familiar story today. John 8:3-11 says:

The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group and said to Jesus, "Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?" They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him. 

But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.

At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. Jesus straightened up and asked her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?"

"No one, sir," she said. "Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."

Now everyone loves the first part of the passage, that this women is saved from condemnation. Yet people rarely looks at the very last line.

We always say we're trying to be more loving, but I wonder what our love is really made of? C.S. Lewis writes in The problem of Pain:

"Love may forgive all infirmities and love still in spite of them: but Love cannot cease to will their removal."

And that's exactly the sort of love Jesus has always displayed; yes, He didn't come to condemn, but he always asked for repentance, for transformation. That is the love of God. Can you imagine if he gave us salvation but left us just as we are? (I don't even want to imagine how miserable I'd be.) He does not intend to leave us be; that we are to become noble vessels, prepared to do any good work.

Did you know, that as leaders of God's Kingdom, we have a responsibility to help people transform; to make disciples of all nations, to see to it that people are becoming more and more like Christ? But how often do we miss the chance to help someone be more like Jesus? All for the sake of being "nice"; that we get trampled on, and put up with all sorts of ungratefulness and obnoxious behavior, because we're supposed to be "loving". We stand idly by, while these people continue untransformed, as if we're satisfied with them keeping their iniquities, and since they don't care, neither do we.

The world is already full of nice people, our testimony isn't just more "nice"; the Holy Spirit within us is the counselor of truth. What the world needs is truth, told in love. Ephesians 4:15 says:

Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ.

When was the last time you really spoke truth boldly into someone's life? Or was it watered-down, sugar coated, chock full of dodgy sentiments but barely getting to the point, rarely getting to the Word of God? We pride ourselves in being a community that is open and authentic. Well, are we authentic with the truth?

When I see my guys, I see their weaknesses just as much as their strengths, and I speak into that; boldly, sometimes harshly, but they know that of me. They know my intent and my love. Ultimately when I meet brothers and sisters, I see their need for more of Jesus, and I speak; that I'm committed to loving them just as they are, but I speak because I know who God intended them to be, and I am not satisfied to leave them just as they are. Are you?

Rooting in the Word

• What are people learning?
  
• As I begin to refine my set of notes that I teach 101 from, I begin to see (along with my co-teacher) that there are many points that are not well supported by the Word of God.
  
• Not that they were unbiblical points mind you, but rather than sharing the relevant passages (which weren't that hard to find), they are more backed by stories of people's personal experiences instead.
  
• I also began to notice that when people share encouraging words to each other, they rarely use the Word. Rather they say "well that person has been set free from that" or "this person experienced exactly what you're going through"
  
• So even at the 101 level people are already learning to rely on other people's experiences as the stuff of their faith.
  
• That people, rather than knowing the Word that speaks on their life situations, know the experiences of others on that situation instead.
  
• There are a lot of topics in 101, that if we rely purely on the word, would need to be dropped, because to explain them properly with the Word would be way beyond the scope of 101.
  
• I think its OK if they were dropped, I'd much rather people know that they have no understanding of something, than to think they know it, based loosely on what someone else felt about it.
  
• What should we be teaching?
  
• Word of God AND the word of us
  
• Personal experiences are great encouragements, and we should continue to share them as we teach and disciple.
  
• But they should never replace the Word of God as the center of our teaching.
  
• When we are in a teaching environment, we must center everything on the Word.
  
• If the Word doesn't say so, we can't teach it, period.
  
• We can share it, but we can't teach it as if it comes from the Bible.
  
• Even if that experience if commonplace, we must still share it as someone else's experience.
  
• Our experiences should support the teachings from the Word, rather than us finding passages that support our interpretation of our experiences.
  
• Ultimately transformation comes from the Word. If we are to get people to help grow themselves (as mentioned in "Personal Visioning"), we must, at every opportunity, point people towards the Word rather than ourselves as discipleship leaders.
  
• That's the only way people can empower themselves. Satan will always twist a marvelous testimony into "That can never happen to YOU."
  
• It removes the reliance on the leaders as the source of growth. The source is Christ, represented in the Word, and interactive through prayer. The leaders are just there to cheer you on.
  
• It places less burdens on leaders, and therefore, more leaders will be inclined to step up.
  
• Leaders don't need to be superstars anymore, because the learning is not centered around the leader's life, but rather the life of Christ.
  
• Community-based teaching environments
  
• At the rate our church is growing, we have to move away from having "classes", to having small groups.
  
• So each campus would have a few 101 small groups, a few Impact small groups, a few P1 small groups, etc.
  
• The only way that can happen is for the various curriculum to be self contained; that they do not rely purely on illustrations from the leader's life (or worse, what the leader has heard from other people's lives)
  
• Thus EVERY point made must be solidly backed by the Word, with the leader's lives as support.
• That even if the leader has not experienced this particular point, they can still teach it, because it is well represented in the Word.
  
• Again, away from superstar teachers that have experienced every point.
  
• That the target is more like Christ, not more like Ken, or more like Tae, or more like Pastor Paul.
  
• That the entire small group, including the "leader", are in it together; to be more like Christ as represented by the Word shared in the curriculum.
  
• Thus the teaching is surrounded by community; where people can put what they learned about God's love to use, where they will be held intimately accountable and be encouraged and supported.
  
• I feel this is a much better model to the typical lecture style class, where half the time the teacher is trying somehow to tie the teaching into each student's life, and making broad generalizations in the process.
  
• Community-based teaching environments ensure that the Word remains deeply personal.
  

Personal Visioning

• Our serving teams inherit a ton of overarching vision from the top leaders
• But how many teams vision on their own? Do we even encourage them to do so? Or are they simply treated as tools that we micromanage?
• Going down to the personal level, do we encourage our leaders to vision on their own, about their personal growth and the growth of their ministries?
• "Where there is no prophetic vision, the people are discouraged," Proverbs 29:18 (ESV)
• How many of our teams, how many of our leaders, seek and receive their vision from God? How many receive them from us?
• Worse yet, how many simply receive instructions/strategies from us and never own their ministries, never own their personal growth?
• Looking into their personal lives, do we encourage people to connect with God personally? To cast their own visions of their walk with God; where they need to go with Him in the next little while.
• Or do we always tell them where they need to grow next, what they should do to get there?
• Not dissing our maturity ministries, heck I oversee them, but there is no formula. We must vision WITH them how they are to grow.
• "Transforming non-Christians into disciple-makers for Christ"
  
• Do people even know this?
• I had to look it up, and seeing the amount of disciple-maker making that is actually happening (e.g. not just people being transformed, but people leading others to transform), I'd say people don't really know this.
• Also, when we say that's our vision, what does that mean for the ushering team? What does that mean for the worship team? What does that mean for our harvest team? How does each of those teams' visions (hopefully they have one), fit in with the overall vision?
• We are constantly trying to raise organizational leaders to head up ministries, but how intentional are we in raising spiritual leaders?
• The great commission says that all of us are to disciple others, we should focus on that first, rather than getting people to lead ministries, and expecting that they get their spiritual leadership to catch up somehow. 
• We should seek to invest in the spiritual lives of emerging leaders first; which ultimately means seeing a disciple maker raised up first, rather than a head usher, or worship leader, or bible study teacher first.
• "Out of your intimacy comes your ministry." Do we stick to this when we raise emerging leaders?
• What is point A? What is point B?
• Ultimately all our ministries (this applies to personal growth too), at any point in time, are moving from point A to point B.
• Visioning is understanding point B (where we are going), and strategizing is understanding point A (where we are right now).
• So many teams start making/improving their strategies, all the while doing very little visioning (or having little understanding of their catch-phrase vision).
• Without vision, without point B, how would you know what "better" is?
• How do you set goals and milestones, how do you gauge progress, if you don't know what the end goal is?
• Going back to personal growth, do people understand that being a disciple-maker is the end goal?
• Maybe that's why we have such a hard time finding discipleship leaders, because people think that being discipled forever is point B.
• It all starts with us (top leaders)
• We always complain that people aren't stepping up to own ministries, that people rely on us to grow
  
• We must cast, recast, recast, recast (see the pattern here?) our visions as ministry overseers, our visions for them as their discipler, otherwise our guys would have nothing to work off of, nothing to look forward to in expectation.
  
• Then we must encourage them to vision on their own, to own a piece of the puzzle, to call that piece their own.
• If all we ever do is make them do what we want, how would they ever own it? How would it ever even FEEL like its theirs?

Sustainable Leadership

• We've had 2 top female leaders roll out of Hamilton and Westside altogether under similar circumstances
• I don't know if it's their personal choice, or whether our model of leadership here, our demands and expectations of their ministry and their leadership, was unrealistic
• Have we made leading here something that only singles would have the time and effort to participate in? Has our church culture discouraged some to never step up just because they don't want to dedicate their entire lives to Westside like everyone else?
• Have we truly honoured our leaders, their time, and their effort? (one example, sticking to meeting times rather than change them as our own schedule changes. In general, not surprising them with changes)
• Did we give them enough "off" time to recharge physically and connect with God personally? (corporate prayer and retreats don't count, they are rarely physically rejuvenating for our leaders who are usually more physically tired than spiritually tired at first)
  
• Did we ensure that they were in supportive, accountable communities? (1 on 1 mentoring is nice, but its mostly for teaching and coaching. Accountability and support is hard to achieve 1 on 1.)
• Along the same lines, do we promote ministry superstardom? This results in leaders being islands; no one feels they are good enough to support them.
  
• From what I found at Willow, what we top leaders do at Westside people get paid to dedicate their full -time to do everywhere else
  
• Again, in light of that, what are realistic expectations of ministry growth? Our own spiritual growth?
• I don't think it lies so much in the what of things, so much as it lies in the pace; how fast we are expected to move things forward.
• At what pace does challenging our leaders become simply a burden to them? Are we setting the bar too high? Are we setting the bar indiscriminately?
• Of course our leaders have a personal responsibility to set their own boundaries, to ensure their own sustained connection with God, to share about their tiredness and to do something about it (see next point)
• But we as overseers must dig and probe, and seek to protect them from damaging themselves, rather than just being ecstatic that they are doing more and more.
• Are we over-spiritualizing growth?
  
• That we always say we can do anything in the Holy Spirit.
  
• But because our expectations are not well discerned, and therefore unrealistic, even in the Kingdom sense, people never get there; a lot of times they physically can't.
  
• This also discourages people from sharing their ministry failures, because now those failures are directly linked with a perceived lack of growth (again back to the need for community for our leaders).
  
• They end up deeply discouraged because now they feel they don't have the Spirit, that they haven't grown because they couldn't achieve these unrealistic goals in the timeframe that we have set for them.

The 3 Greatest Commandments

Lately I've been thinking about what it means to serve, what it means to lead, what it means to come Saturday, what Saturday service is even supposed to look like. And I know each of us here does so many things here at Hamilton campus; that we all come here at 1pm with a mission, and a list of tasks to be done today. And it's so easy to let ourselves think that these tasks; doing this, teaching that, attending this, IS church. That church is this big show we put on every Saturday, that church becomes something we do for God, instead of something that we share with God in, something that He's allowed us to be a part of. Acts 2:42-47 says:

They devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles. All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need. Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.

Church is about 3 things: Loving God, loving people, and seeing to it that others do the same. When we let our planning, our scheduling, our organizing take away from our simple devotion to those 3 things, we've missed it. We've missed what Saturday service is about.

I've heard so many people talk about excellence, that for the newcomers we need to be excellent in all that we do, and because of that people no longer just consider every detail, they agonize over every one. I catch myself thinking like that sometimes, talking like that sometimes. But what I think is more important, what I think the newcomers will notice most of all, beyond the polish, beyond the snazziness, is the joy, that real, abundant joy that overflows from us because of Christ; of us meeting the head, and now being part of the body. And if our "excellence" is taking away from that joy, then I think we've missed the point of what church is supposed to be.

The question I want you all to pray over this afternoon, is did you come here with joy? As Pastor Paul always says, this is a time of celebration, Saturday service is a party. I'd go as far as to say that if you're not having fun doing what you do this afternoon, you're doing something wrong. Honestly though, I've never had this much fun at any other place than Westside Hamilton, I love being here serving with you guys every saturday. I hope you feel the same way, don't ever forget it. If you do nothing else at all today, remember, and reflect that joy.

Willow Creek Group Life Conference '08

Here are some pictures from the Group Life Conference, notes and other thoughts to follow soon:

Some random pics of just inside the main entrance.

This is their OLD auditorium, half of it that is......the pic of the new one is in the post from last year.

BIG Christian book store, picked up an ESV compact bible because PAl recommended that translation.

Pretty much the EXACT same hotel room as last year. Thank goodness for earplugs!

New room!

So I moved in with Tae, Eric, and Cecil for the fall, and here's my new room:

From "Knowing the Face of God"

When we speak of a personal relationship with him, we are speaking of a relationship with a personality totally different from any we can know here on earth. What I know of him can only be the tiniest fraction of his fullness. Yet what I know today is real, it is deep, and it is entirely significant, for it lays the foundation of a relationship that will last forever.

So the phrase "a personal relationship" turns out to be a good way to speak of God. Knowing God is in some ways as simple and as familiar as knowing a friend. It is also as complex, as endless, as infatuating, and as frustrating as trying to understand those we love - or even ourselves. For the more we know, the more we are called to explore farther in and higher up. And in the immense echoing splendor of God there is much more to know than we can ever comprehend.

- Tim Stafford

From "Knowing the Face of God"

Our problem is that Christ lives in us and that at the same time we wait for him to come. According to the Bible we are children of God, yet we often feel like orphans. Which perspective is the Bible speaking from, the middle or the end? Scripture, I believe, mainly presents us with a view of life from the end - "the eternal perspective," we might call it, or even "the heavenly view." This view separates what is real from what is unreal. What is real is what will last. Everything else, no matter how real it seems to us, is treated as insubstantial, hardly worth a snort. That is why Scripture can seem at times so blithely and irritatingly out of touch with reality, brushing past huge philosophical problems and personal agony. That is just how life is when you are looking from the end. Perspective changes everything. What seemed so important at the time has no significance at all.

- Tim Stafford

High Dynamic Range (HDR) Photography

Been trying out this new custom firmware for my Canon SD600, and also messing with HDR photography software (Photomatix to be exact). Some pics:

 

My Room (in all it's messyness)

Some very nicely cut peppers 

My street

Sponge cake, from scratch.

With a red wine berry compot, not nearly as hard as you'd think.....

From "Knowing the Face of God"

"The Bible does not automatically bring life and inspiration to everyone who reads it, any more than pictures of my wife and children automatically bring fond thoughts to anyone who looks at them. It is only when we live in a relationship to people whose images are recorded on a photograph that we can love them through it. It is only when we live in relationship to the living Jesus that we can see and hear him through the Scriptures."

-Tim Stafford

From "Knowing the Face of God"

"God gives Job, in a poetically grand manner, one instruction: Take the first three chapters of Genesis seriously. Yet this message has two sides. In content, God tells Job to shut up. In form, he rewards his noise. For God delivers the answer personally. He cares enough not to send a message but to come personally before Job's eyes. He will not - or cannot - answer Job's question the way Job wants them answered, but he will answer. Job got what every righteous man longed for: the actual presence of God."

-Tim Stafford

From "Knowing the Face of God"

"People who have suffered are often peculiarly receptive to others' experiences; they hear the nuances of pain that others miss. Such a person may not talk of his suffering at all, but somehow other sufferers detect him. They are drawn to him because they sense he cannot be shocked by the violence of their pain, and because, as one who has survived suffering, he embodies real hope. People who have suffered understand each other in a way that others who have not suffered cannot."

-Tim Stafford

DC Talk - Fearless

Haunted by a jaded past,
never thought that love could last,
hope was but a castaway at sea.
Skepticism took its toll,
closed the windows to my soul,
was fighting just to keep my sanity.

When out of the noise I could hear you breathing.
You came along knowing just what I needed.
Turned me around and you got me believing,
you would die for me.

Now I'm fearless, with nothing left to hide.
All the doubts of yesterday, love has driven them away.
And now I'm fearless, when I am by your side.
Its forever me and you, in this covenant of truth.
You know I'm fearless.

Patiently you stripped away,
the walls of pride that I had raised.
You revealed the child inside of me.
We will run and not grow old,
soar on wings as Ive been told,
together we will fly the heavenlies.

Cause out of the noise I could hear you breathing.
You came along knowing just what I needed.
Turned me around and you got me believing,
I would die for you.

Now I'm fearless, with nothing left to hide.
All the doubts of yesterday, love has driven them away.
And now I'm fearless, when I am by your side.
Its forever me and you, in this covenant of truth.
You know I'm fearless.

Some of us leave the vine,
some of us fall in line,
all of us have a friend in Jesus.
Some of us live in fear,
some of us persevere,
knowing that you are near me.

I'm fearless, with nothing left to hide.
All the doubts of yesterday, love has driven them away.
And now I'm fearless, when I am by your side.
Its forever me and you, in this covenant of truth.
You know I'm fearless.

Longest thesis title as of now

Computer Controlled, Surface-based Instrumentation and Automated Post Processing Techniques for Mechanical Stimuli Studies of Human Muscle Spindles and other Proprioceptive Organs.

John Wesley's Holy Club

1. Am I consciously or unconsciously creating the impression that I am better than I really am? In other words, am I a hypocrite?
2. Am I honest in all my acts and words, or do I exaggerate?
3. Do I confidentially pass on to another what was told me in confidence?
4. Can I be trusted?
5. Am I a slave to dress, friends, work, or habits?
6. Am I self-conscious, self-pitying, or self-justifying?
7. Did the Bible live in me today?
8. Do I give it time to speak to me everyday?
9. Am I enjoying prayer?
10. When did I last speak to someone else about my faith?
11. Do I pray about the money I spend?
12. Do I get to bed on time and get up on time?
13. Do I disobey God in anything?
14. Do I insist upon doing something about which my conscience is uneasy?
15. Am I defeated in any part of my life?
16. Am I jealous, impure, critical, irritable, touchy, or distrustful?
17. How do I spend my spare time?
18. Am I proud?
19. Do I thank God that I am not as other people, especially as the Pharisees who despised the publican?
20. Is there anyone who I fear, dislike, disown, criticize, hold resentment toward or disregard? If so, what am I doing about it?
21. Do I grumble or complain constantly?
22. Is Christ real to me?
    

Sink or swim...or walk!

God really spoke to me through it this week though Matthew 14:22-31, the recount of Jesus and Peter walking on water. I've read this story dozens of times now, but as I started to take on new roles at Westside Hamilton, and looking ahead to transitioning out of school, this passage took on new meaning for me this week.

Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd. After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, but the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it.

During the fourth watch of the night Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. "It's a ghost," they said, and cried out in fear.

But Jesus immediately said to them: "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid."

"Lord, if it's you," Peter replied, "tell me to come to you on the water."

"Come," he said.

Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!"

Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?"

First thing I want to share is that these impossible things that God calls us to do, these impossible situations that sometimes we get ourselves into, they are not tests of your faith, or at least not tests as you and I know them. If it were really a test, Jesus would've said to Peter "oooooooh, not enough faith, guess you're cut Pete, sorry." No, he immediately picked Peter back up. When God allows these situations in your life, it's not a test in the sense that you're screwed if you fail, he'll always be there to pull you out; that none of these failures will be, or were meant to be, fatal.

But more important to notice is that, what was Peter doing between the time he stepped out, and when he started to drown? He WALKED on water. Think about that for a sec, he WALKED on liquid, STORMY liquid at that. I'm barely a decent swimmer, never mind walker on water, I can't even imagine how awesome that would've been.

Jesus didn't call Peter out, he didn't call us out, to test our faith; as if to show us what our faith can and cannot do. He knows that our faith is small, he knows that we'll fall short, he knows that our walk with him isn't going to be one success after the other. His whole point is that between the time you take that first step out, and when you inevitably fall down, you get to be miraculous. That for those momentary struggles, for those fews gulps of salty water you take in, you get to walk on water for bit. When Peter remembers this event, what do you think he remembered most? Struggling to swim? Or do you think he remembered walking on water?

Do you fear your lack of faith? So much so that you don't even want to step out anymore, that you start saying to yourself "I know I'm going to drown out there". Don't let your amount of faith become a anxiety-causing performance indicator in your walk with God; that you think you have enough faith to accomplish this or you think you're much too lacking in faith to do that . Do you realize that God knows you don't have enough faith? He says in Matthew 17:20 that if we have faith as small as a mustard seed we can move mountains. Since I'm not seeing many mountains moving, it's pretty safe to say that God knows that our faith is small. Do you know that when God calls you to do something outrageously supernatural, he knows you don't have what it takes, but he just wants you to see yourself, by his power, walking on water?

I don't know what crazy hard things God has called you to do, maybe it's to take on a new ministry, maybe it's to take on less ministry. Maybe it's to go invest in your old church, maybe it's to leave your old church. To reach old friends, or to reach new people.....I don't know. But step out, go for it, knowing that your faith is too small, knowing that you'll fall short, but most of all, knowing that, for however long you manage, you'll be walking on water.

We are all =

The Bible tells us to love our neighbours as ourselves, but a lot of us have trouble with that, mostly because deep in our hearts we feel that there are certain people that just aren't worthwhile; that we feel as if some people don't deserve our love, or at least that they ought to come to church all broken and repentant since they are so much worse than us.

Well, is that really true? Are there actually people further from God than you and me?

Take me, my mentor (his name is Tae, a wonderful man of God), and a prostitute who does business down my street (I live in a suburban neighbourhood, but you could ignore that for now) as an example. What, then, is the difference between the 3 of us and God?

The above figure illustrates what the world thinks of that scenario; that my mentor is a bit closer to God than me (I'm rapidly catching up mind you), and let's say that the prostitute is REALLY awful, like not only does he/she commit adultery, but she steals from and drugs her clients all the while. So I'd probably think I'm MILES closer to God than him/her. That's what the world usually thinks isn't it? That we are somehow more or less good, more or less bad, more or less worthwhile, based on how well we follow certain laws and regulations and how much success we have. Sadly even some churches run like that; that certain types of people are closer, and are more worthwhile to invest in, more of use to God than others.

But back to the figure, as a lot people say nowadays, everything is relative. So the ratio x/y*100 represents the distance I/the world perceive between the prostitute's and my goodness, expressed as a percentage of the distance between me and God's goodness. Isaiah 53:9 says

As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

So it's pretty obvious to say that 'y', the distance between me and God, is infinity. So then what happens to our ratio?

Any quantity, regardless of magnitude or direction, divided by infinity is zero. So, in reality, the difference between me and that prostitute, with God in mind, is zero. As in, on my own, I am not a single step closer to God than he/she is; that seeing everyone on this planet as equals before God is not a matter of humility, it's simply a matter of fact. They are all ACTUALLY your equals, and if you are acting any differently, you're just being ignorant of reality. We are all equally, in the absolute mathematical sense, far from God, and just as equally saved by the blood of Jesus.

How do you owe?

When I think about Easter, I think particularly about forgiveness. I guess that's why to me Easter is more important than Christmas. I mean Jesus coming to Earth is important, but if he didn't do what he did at Easter it'd be all pretty useless. And what he did in the end was to forgive, you, me, and everybody for all our trespasses from the first day we knew how. He came to die, he came to save, he came to forgive.

Matthew 6:12 Jesus says to pray that God

Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.

It says, forgive others in the same way God forgave you. That leads to a question, do you know the ways in which you've been forgiven? Sometimes I imagine what it'd be like if God forgave us the way we forgive others. He'd be like "Ken, I know you coveted that Subaru Impreza just now. But it's ok, I forgive you. I won't strike you down with lightening when you walk outside this afternoon. But, um, I don't think I want to see you in my heaven anymore, ever." Sound silly right? But isn't that the way most of us forgive? How many times have you heard someone, or even yourself, say that "I forgive her, but I don't ever want to see her again", have you seen people say "I've let that go", but goto great lengths to avoid that person? We train ourselves to quickly dismiss the sin, but never bring ourselves to accept the sinner.

But that's not the way God forgives us is it? He hated our sin, but wanted to see us, to talk to us, to be with us, forever. He couldn't just let our sin slide, to cast a blind eye at it, but he wanted to accept us so badly that he sent his son to die so that our sins, our debts, would be accounted for. That is how God forgave you.

Forgive others in the same way God forgave you. How do you forgive people? Are there people that you have forgiven but have not accepted? Are there hurts in your past, that even though now you've chosen not to talk about it, you still hold that person in the darkest parts of your heart? Do you realize that whatever others have done to you, you've already done worse to God, and yet God chose to die for you, to accept you, and that he asks you to do the same?

Before even that, are you struggling to let go of certain hurts? Luke 7:47 says

He who has been forgiven little loves little.

I use to struggle with loving others, forgiving others, because I never truly knew in my heart what Christ did for me, but at men's retreat last year God broke my heart for what broke his in my life, as cliched as that sounds. Ask God to show you, in one overwhelming instant, everything in your life that was put on him at the cross. Because nothing else you do this afternoon makes any sense until you freely receive, and freely give, God's forgiveness. Easter is in 2 weeks. If you haven't fully accepted, fully realized that forgiveness, ask God to show you. If you haven't fully given, fully poured out, that forgiveness, confess, repent before God, and go do something before He rises 3 days later.

From "Knowing the Face of God"

"God has chosen to root his power in our shared concerns, to act in communion with us. He does not need our consent to act - he prefers it. Put simply, he waits to act until he has talked it over with us. And he rarely takes the initiative. He waits until it matters enough to us to bring it up with him."

-Tim Stafford

From "The Problem of Pain"

"Love may forgive all infirmities and love still in spite of them; but Love cannot cease to will their removal."

- C.S. Lewis

Gots My Back

I've been reading Jeremiah for my QT, and there are actually a couple of sections titled "Jeremiah's Complaint", and really, he had plenty to complain about. Jeremiah was God's prophet at a time when Israel was in deep sin; idols everywhere, God's own priests ignored God and spread about false prophecies of peace and security. So Jeremiah wasn't exactly the bringer of good news. Message after message predicting disaster for Israel: famine, sword, captivity...that God was hugely displeased with Israel and is planning to destroy them. Needless to say, the Israelites weren't particular thrilled to have Jeremiah around.

So Jeremiah complains: "God, I've done everything you've told me to do. Every time I've received a word from you I've stood at the gates and shouted it like you told me to. And you know, these messages aren't exactly pleasant, they're not exactly happy to hear that they'll be killed by foreigners, taken away as slaves, or that they'll starve to death. And I'm sure that the next time I stand at those gates, bringing another message like that, they're GOING TO KILL ME! Where are you God?! Do you really have my back?"

This is how God answers Jeremiah, Jeremiah 15:19-21:

Therefore this is what the LORD says:

'If you repent,
I will restore you that you may serve me;
if you utter worthy, not worthless, words,
you will be my spokesman.

Let this people turn to you,
but you must not turn to them.

I will make you a wall to this people,

a fortified wall of bronze;
they will fight against you
but will not overcome you,
for I am with you to rescue and save you,"
declares the LORD.

'I will save you from the hands of the wicked
and redeem you from the grasp of the cruel.'

That's it. "if you repent...if you utter worthy words...if you don't turn to the world", "I will make you a wall...they will not overcome you...I am with you to save you and redeem you". God says, do what I tell you to do, and I have your back.

Maybe you're wondering, with all this school/work stuff, should I still spend time at bible studies, at discipleship group, spending half the day serving on Saturdays. Maybe you're afraid of rocking the boat with this one person that God is telling you to reach, maybe a family member, a close friend, or a classmate. Maybe God's telling you to take on a new ministry, to step out in faith knowing that it's totally new territory for you. And you're thinking to yourself, well, this probably won't go well. What should I do?

Well here it is: You do what God tells you to do, He's got your back; if God gives you a clear word, and you DON'T do it, I'm convinced you've already missed God's best in that situation. And who knows what 2nd best is like, what 3rd best is like, what 4th best is like. Honestly, if we let God's conviction slide like I used to do, that number rolls straight into the 50s. If I ever manage to stop myself on the slippery slope of disobedience, I'd be lucky to receive God's 53rd best.

God is waiting, desiring, to give you His very best. All you have to do is listen, obey, and receive. So let's ask God to search our hearts, are there any areas of disobedience? Things that I know He's asked me to do that I just plain haven't done? He won't bless us until He knows we are willing to obey in every area of our lives. So before we claim anything in our lives in Jesus' name, let's repent of any disobedience that God finds in our hearts.

Ginny Owens - Own Me

Got a stack of books, so I could learn how to live;
many are left half-read, covered by the cobwebs on my shelf.
And I got a list of laws, growing longer everyday;
if I keep pluggin' away, maybe one day I'll perfect myself.

Oh, but all of my labor, seems to be in vain.
And all of my laws, just cause me more pain.
So I fall before You, in all of my shame,
ready and willing to be changed.

Own me,
take all that I am.
And heal me,
with the blood of the lamb.
Mold me,
with your gracious hand, break me till I'm only Yours.
Own me.

Oh, you call me precious, and you take my blame.
And you run to meet me, when I cry out your name.
So I fall before You, in all of my shame.
Lord, I am willing to be changed.

Own me,
take all that I am.
And heal me,
with the blood of the Lamb.
Mold me,
with Your gracious hand, break me till I'm only yours.
Own me.

Ginny Owens - If You Want Me To

The pathway is broken, and the signs are unclear.
And I don't know the reason, why you brought me here.
But just because you love me, the way that you do;
I'm gonna walk through the valley,
if you want me to.

Cause I'm not who I was, when I took my first step.
And I'm clinging to the promise, you're not through with me yet.
So if all of these trials, bring me closer to you,
then I will go through the fire,
if you want me to.

It may not be the way, I would have chosen.
When you lead me through a world that's not my home.
But you never said it would be easy,
you only said I'd never go alone

So when the whole world turns against me, and I'm all by myself.
And I can't hear you answer, my cries for help.
I'll remember the suffering, your love put you through.
And I will go through the valley,
if you want me to.

Ginny Owens - This Road

A million miles away, from anything familiar,
a thousand places I would rather be.
So I choke back the tears, and try to find the bright side,
though I find it hard to see though all my suffering.

In my heart I know your plan is so much bigger,
but this small part is all that I can see.
And I believe you haven't left me here to wander,
still I can't help but ponder where you're leading me.

And I ask why this road,
why this way,
and this load.
Tell me how far must I go;
till I see, till I know why,
this road.

A million miles away, from anything familiar,
what was it like to be so far from home.
Though you came in love, the world misunderstood you.
There must have been some days when you felt so alone.

But you endured, 'cause there was joy before you.
Joy that came because you sacrificed.
Since you gave yourself just to spend forever with me,
surely I can trust you'll lead me through my darkest times.

When I ask why this road,
why this way,
and this load.
Tell me how far must I go;
till I see, till I know,
why...

From here I cannot see,
why you'd choose this path for me.
But I don't have to understand, to believe,
that you know why...

You know why this road,
why this way,
and this load.
You know how far I must go;
till I see, till I know why,
this road.

Loved (to) Pieces

So my sister invited a friend of hers from our old church to Westside Sauga over the break, someone she knew was open to seeing Westside. Well, 2 of his friends ended up tagging along. Unfortunately, those 3 friends together make exactly one attention lacking 12 year old. My sister was pretty peeved, that those 2 really distracted this one friend from experiencing God fully during service, and really hindered her from speaking to him about her transformation and his spiritual life. That got me pretty ticked too, especially since one of those 2 has been to Westside a bunch, and doesn't like it. Really, it's OK to not like this church. When I first came to Westside, I thought it was the greatest thing since sliced bread, and I thought everyone should be here. But I know now that God has great plans for other places for other people. So people don't have to be here, they don't even need to like it, that's totally cool. But why tag along if you knew you wouldn't like it?!

I look at all of you here and I know each of us has found a home, a family, that we call our own here at Westside Hamilton, but I'm forced to realize now that some people just don't get it. And I thought, well, what makes us different; that people look at us, scratch their heads and say "what's wrong with you people?". The only difference I could come up with is this: that each of us here knows with certainty, knows by experience, and can actually feel every single day, that without God, we are flawed, damaged, and broken. We've all experienced the sort of despair, the sort of pain, the sort of hopelessness that lives far God can bring.

I look back at retreat, at that room of people crying out to God, and I start remembering the stories of brokenness that each of you have shared with this family. Whether it be finances, relationships, family, addictions, failures, sickness; we've been abused, outcast, made fun of, unloved, hurt. Each of us has an area of our lives, past or present, that just won't heal without God.

And that's why Isaiah 53:4-5 are not just verses to us, it's just plain reality. It says

Surely he took up our infirmities and carried our sorrows, yet we considered him stricken by God, smitten by him, and afflicted.

But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.

We don't need to convince ourselves of these words because we know our iniquities are plenty; that even without having to see them through Christian glasses, we know our transgressions are great. But we know most of all that the one reason, the ONLY reason, we are here today, is because Jesus took all of that away; that the punishment due us even in THIS lifetime, He took upon Himself on that cross, that by His wounds, by His scars, we are healed, restored, blessed.

And so, all I wanted to do in this time today, is to thank God. You know what to thank him for in your life. And even if this is your thousandth time thanking him for that one thing He has reconciled, you know he deserves a thousand more.

Good ol' Snoop

From "Handle with Prayer"

"One primary reason God allows us to suffer is so we can identify with others in our prayers. Until we suffer, we tend to stereotype those who suffer as inferior or weak. We have little patience with them, much less any burden to pray for them. But Christ lived among the rejected and suffering. He was one of them."

- Charles Stanley

True Vibe - I Live for You

I was lost in darkness,
never knowing where to turn.
I thought I had all the answers, but
I had so much to learn.
Like a child I had gone astray,
trying to make it on my own.
Like a father You embraced me,
and You showed the way back home.

Now that I know,
the truth that you proclaim.
I will keep trusting You, to fill me up,
till only You remain.
And I will not rest until my every word,
brings glory to Your name
All that I am, all that I do,
I live for You.

Only You could save me,
from the debt I had to pay.
So now I want to tell the world,
the difference You have made
You have changed the way I live and love,
and made my heart brand new.
Now that we are joined together,
I know I'm nothing without You.

Now that I know,
the truth that you proclaim.
I will keep trusting You, to fill me up,
till only You remain.
And I will not rest until my every word,
brings glory to Your name
All that I am, all that I do,
I live for You.