12:10 AM 7/13/2003

Just so glad, please don't let this one by..........just so so thankful that we have our fifth housemate, i knew it was either goin to be this or it was goin to be $1100 as punishment for our hastiness, now things are somewhat more normal.....thanks so much......i know itz kinda sad that i can only praise you now in times of happiness, that i've slack in praying these last couple days, even weeks......work has slowed down again, but i think i'm goin to enjoy the new pace that you have blessed me with. You've reminded me that this job is about experience, not money; and that i've got other things to do with my time this summer (wish i could volunteer, but bio along w/ the time for the tests and the training time and setup time i'm not goin to be able to put in much hours, so no point starting). Bio looks like fun, and now i have a couple days a weeek to dedicate to it, so i thank you for once again making this perfect in front of my eyes. Weather has been nice lately, the heat last week was bad, but this week has kinda been just right, even the rainy days. I really need to pray now for strength and guidance, and wisdom in dealing with David. It is really hard to get anything through to him, and i think i need to get off my high horse and just let him be........i can't really change him, but i can change myself........hopefully business will pick up again so i can at least get 3 full working days, then in my mind it'd be perfect. But your plan is probably better so i'll stick to whatever comes. Just so thankful for the housemate, that itz also someone we can kinda look after, and share our last year experiences with. I'm definitely looking forward to investing myself in getting to know felix and kevin and anton better, although somehow in my gut i think felix will really be the only one receptive to me. Just pray that i'm not that one that's one their case, and that they won't be abusing their freedom (so that i don't have to be on their case). Church fellowship is continuing to bloom, people are getting closer, at least from a surface standpoint, and i don't really expect that much more. I think camp would really be a good closing experience, as we pull all our loose personalities together, and say our farewells to another summer. I pray that as you're always w/ us in our gatherings, that you especially touch us during camp, as we look to you to show up. Really pray for brian, he'll be there, and for the first time it isn't about fun and games (eventhough that's a large part of camp). He 's now in a crowd that i think can come to him at the intellectual level that he's very capable of, and i think he is probably better reached at that level, versus Xara style stuff. Just pray that however you lead me in terms of him, that i can respond and be used by you. Really need to life up CCF to you, especially frosh connections, dunno who can represent there, but hopefully 2 can show up. I'm a little torn at this point, cuz both are important, and Jeff's already shown that he can drop fellowship and go. I don't know what i need to do, i want to be at camp, but at the same time Mac CCF needs people at frosh connections......make something happen lord, need your help.....Lift up Phoebe to you, dunno what she's thinking, but at least she is thinking...i'm not really one she can confide in, and i don't know what i cna say either......perhaps i need to say less, cuz in the end i'm not the one with answers. You just need to touch her, she doesn't need death or cancer or whatever to scare her faith back into her, she just needs to you touch her and say "here i am", that's all she needs lord, for her to know you're there, then i think all of it will have meaning again, just really lift her up for your healing......thanks once again for the tremendous rock you have taken off my shoulders, now if only i can register i'd be set......thanks.......